I have special mornings,

On some I reflect, on some I make plans, on some I cry, on some I can’t help but be joyful and on some… I’m numb.

I’m currently staying at a friend’s house right now because I’m in between moving. And honestly? I can’t help but feel grateful. Grateful that I have people I can lean on and a roof over my head.

But then I ask myself, “would I have been privileged enough to have these moments if I hadn’t nurtured my relationships?”

Building Sisterhood in Unexpected Places

Shortly after I first arrived in Canada, I met someone who quickly became like family. Let’s call her my sister.

She’s vibrant, full of energy, and loves people deeply. At the same time, she can be frustrating, temperamental, and a little dramatic. But I love her all the same. Our bond formed quickly, and we decided to move in together. I couldn’t believe how close we became in such a short time. She loved me for me, and I loved her for her.

Was there friction? Ha! You bet!

We fought. Oh Lord, we fought! There was an obscene amount of miscommunication (mostly on my end), that would turn into silence that stretched for days, sometimes weeks. But eventually, she’d send me something like: “So you’re really okay with not talking to me this long?” I’d smile, respond, and just like that, we were back.

The One That Got Away: A Friendship I Still Grieve

She wasn’t my roommate, but she was my sister in every way that mattered. This was someone I could cry with, laugh with, confide in. She taught me vulnerability. She was my very own cheerleader who always had my back and wanted me to win.

You know those rare people who love you so fully you never doubt them? That was her.

And I miss her. I grieve our friendship on more occasions than I care to admit. On some days, it hurts worse than shattered glass against skin.

How Distance Changed Everything

The truth? Our friendship ended because of me.

I let one bad day cancel out years of love we had built. I wasn’t patient when she needed me to be. I wasn’t kind when she needed me most. And I wonder: if she hadn’t moved away, would I have handled things differently?

Distance mehn, distance can kill relationships if care isn’t taken. When she moved to another province, I was happy for her growth but sad for what we were losing. The calls became less, the laughs faded, and the conversations lost their spark.

We tried to hold on, but it just. didn’t. work. And I regret not trying harder.

Gratitude for the Friendships That Remain

If I had let my current-roommate-relationship die the same way, I wouldn’t have had the support I need during this season. She’s been my anchor. Constantly making sure I’m okay, supporting me through my good and bad days and never leaving my side.

It made me realize something: in life, you never fully know what you have until it slips away.

Don’t let a moment of anger destroy a bond that took years to build. Don’t let distance, pride, or stress pull you away from your tribe, your people, your family. Because the loss of those bonds? It cuts deep. Too deep.

Lessons on Love, Loss, and Moving Forward

Today, I’m grateful for the people I still have. I grieve those I’ve lost, not because I doubt I’ll ever find love like that again, but because I miss the person who once held that space in my life.

To my sister, the one that got away—you know who you are.

I miss you.